i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
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