Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
Randomize
