I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
Randomize
