I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
"just because you look like a short version of scarlet johanson does not mean I would immediately fuck you" that was the single.most difficult thing to say. but seriously I don't want the roots of the whore tree anywhere near my junk.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
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