just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
Randomize