i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
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