six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
well, you know. whores of a feather.
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
Randomize
