So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
Randomize
