he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
do herpes really smell.
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
Randomize
