Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
Dating a girl 4 years younger than you is like living in a Taylor Swift song...
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
Randomize
