the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
Randomize
