When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
I'm always down for nudity.
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
