he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
