We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
I don't know how to tell my mom that I'm not sober enough to drive to the dentist...
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
Randomize
