I hate all girls vehemently.
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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