who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
Randomize
