Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
Make me a sandwich
The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I'll make you a sandwich.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
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