He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Randomize
