Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
I have surprise drugs for everyone
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
