Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
Auto correct isn't even working for how drunk you are
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
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