Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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