Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
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