think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
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