why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
Randomize
