Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
I woke up this morning to my panties draped around the neck of an empty bottle of bulleit. That is the perfect visual metaphor for my life at this juncture.
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Randomize
