just tell him i said nine months
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
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