God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
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