who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
I just told a squirrel he was gonna suffocate because he was eating a plastic bag. and i stared at him till he spit it out. Its official, I love squirrels more than people. they actually listen.
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
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