he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
Nope. She just screamed at me "YOU WERE A FAILED ABORTION" and "I'LL PUT ANTHRAX IN YOUR PILLOW YOU LITTLE FUCK". Best mother award ever
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
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