Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
Randomize
