I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
I just realized i masturbated to the home shopping network. I either need to get a boyfriend asap, or a subscription to a porn website, or i just need to stop taking ambien
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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