oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
She made me pour olive oil on her.
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
Randomize