Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
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