The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
Randomize
