What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
Can you bring me the toilet please
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
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