I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
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