awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize
