If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
I just saw a Puerto Rican child between the ages of 8 and 11 with a faint mustache talking very loudly on the bluetooth in his ear about how "Skittles are played the fuck out"
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
