i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
Your Saturday night was spent at the opera, mine was spent exchanging naked pics with a hot middle aged man that is so ripped that he looks like he's photoshopped. This is why we're blood sisters. We balance each other out.
I hate you so hard.
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