We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
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