She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
Randomize
