You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
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