She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
Randomize
