I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
Randomize
