so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
Randomize
