You're so nebulous sometimes
Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
Girls should come with a carfax report
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Randomize
