I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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