She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
Randomize
