And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
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