is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
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