He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
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